We’re sitting on a plush sofa in a historic walled garden surrounded by mature apple trees that cling to the 17th century stonework and squirrels who occasionally take a break from their scurrying, squirrelly business to peep at us from behind the hedgerows on the rolling lawns beyond our little courtyard.
The sun is thinking about setting behind the soft, hazy clouds of an unseasonably warm British autumn, and a stylish fire pit embedded in our table is chasing any hint of chills away.
I’m totally blissed out following a sublime facial and massage in the hands of an expert, and slowly sipping a classic tart/sweet Mojito while he’s opted for glugging (he can’t help himself! And I don’t blame him…) a complex Oaxacan Negroni: smoke, citrus and spice working together in perfect harmony.
Our Pan-Asian fusion feast arrives: a fragrant Gai Pad Krapow teeming with aromatic Thai basil; a sweetly spicy Sri Lankan chicken curry; a little dish of deeply umami kimchi rice; a second little dish of softly punchy Kottu Roti. Mid-feast, I’ll experience, for the first time, the deep thrill of a Spicy Margarita while he gets lost in his Lost in Asia: a vodka martini, twisted up with lychee, grapefruit, grenadine. Oh, we’re in heaven… in Shepton Mallet, some 16 miles/26km southwest of Bath and around 5 miles/8km east of Wells.
If you’re local to Bath, you’ll already be aware that the historic little market town of Shepton Mallet is nestled in an area of outstanding natural beauty that acts as the gateway to the Mendip Hills. Montigo Resorts Somerset at Charlton House takes that ‘outstanding natural beauty’ vibe and maxes out on it: a county house hotel and spa set within and against an elegantly sprawling backdrop of manicured lawns, water features and magical historic flourishes, featuring a collection of characterfully stylish bedrooms and suites, restaurants, bars, a striking orangery and a recently-refurbished thermal spa to explore… and spa pet-pampering services too.
Our exotic Saturday afternoon adventure took place in the hotel’s Tiigo: a flexible indoor/outdoor space with its own dedicated Tiki Bar and kitchen, perfect for pop-ups, private events… and the 2-hour bottomless brunch, which puts a range of wholly authentic Asian-themed dishes with a playful twist in the menu spotlight, accompanied by a limitless selection of expertly hand-crafted signature cocktails for the all-inclusive, ‘bottomless’ price of £60pp (but you can choose to go a la carte, should you be less indulgent than we are.) It’s a vibrant, sensual, fun experience, the like of which you’re extremely unlikely to find elsewhere in the surrounding countryside – or even, perhaps, anywhere else in the south west. And the same could be said for the hotel itself…
We checked in on a Friday evening, having driven through the kind of weather that doesn’t really make it clear where the heavy storm clouds end and the road begins. The house acted as a beacon of inviting relief looming above the fog before we’d even set foot in reception: a grand fusion of Baroque flourishes, classic Regency-era renaissance vibes and cutesy Jacobean brickwork, the sound of a waterfall calmly tinkling in the background defying the clatter of rolling thunder as we left the car behind for the weekend.
Our bolthole for the following two nights was Orchard View: a stylishly quirky, super-pretty wood-panelled room on the first floor, complete with its own little private balcony surrounded by greenery and overlooking part of the hotel’s grounds. The bathroom? A smart, gleaming paean to contemporary luxury with a massive roll-top bathtub and a huge walk-in shower. The bed? An antique four-poster, hoorah! The room had a fairy tale vibe – and we felt like the king and queen of a magical castle.
We had dinner in the hotel’s restaurant: an elegant, window-lined chill-out zone surrounded by several plush, opulent bar areas and a big alfresco terrace, the whole area bathed in softly-lit sparkle. Menus skip along to a confident modern British/Asian fusion beat; over two nights, we happily skipped along with that beat, with dishes such as Pressed Braised Ox Cheek with Celeriac Puree, Asian Steak Tartare, Tandoori Monkfish Tail, Cider-braised Pork Belly and Chocolate Delice standing out for particular acclaim. It’s an accessible array, exceedingly well-priced for the quality on offer and beautifully presented, supplemented by a bistro menu (all-day brunches; classics on a burger/steak theme) for those in search of a less formal bite… and superb breakfast options the following morning.
After sampling one of those superb breakfasts, a little slice of Saturday morning was All About Me – well, me and Yaya, an Indonesian massage therapist with apparently magical powers in her fingertips. While He occupied himself in the whirlpool, sauna, steam room, indoor/outdoor pool and Roman-inspired Laconium adjacent to the calm, softly-scented surroundings of the Charlton House Spa sanctuary itself, Yaya took years off me – literally! – with a gently-intense facial, shoulder, arm and lower leg massage that left me floating on a cloud of wellbeing after which I was capable of doing nothing but fall into a deep sleep on our fairytale four-poster bed, the sound of a gentle wind whispering through the leaves that surrounded our little balcony my lullaby – bliss.
Renewed, refreshed and reinvigorated, I was ready to visit Tiigo and get worldly again… which brings us back full circle to the point where this review began, on that sofa in that historic courtyard sipping those perfect cocktails before our pan-Asian foodie adventure.
Montigo Resorts Somerset at Charlton House is a rising star on the Somerset country house hotel scene, offering loved-up couples, friends reunited, wedding parties and families (including those with their four-legged friends in tow) alike a very warm welcome whatever the occasion – or on no particular occasion at all other than the fact that you should Just Do It. It’s a charming, accessibly luxurious, fashionably elegant away-from-it-all haven, staffed by a team of lovely, genuine people.
It is, overall, genuinely lovely.
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